HAPPY NEW YEAR/BURNS NIGHT

So.
This could be awkward.

Or we could push through the long silence and get back into this like I never forgot about you, blog.

Soz pal.


Yeah, apologies I've been away for ages, and the longer I was away the harder it was to return. There is a song about that somewhere, and I think it may be this one:

(Courtesy of Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ha-FS_CHmGw User: Z7TomC7Z)

If not, I'll bet you're still glad you listened.
There is a lie in this blog. Can you read it?

So I haven't been here, and I've been waiting to have something very hilarious and entertaining to greet you all with, but I decided I shouldn't wait for something to happen, I should type it. Luckily that's when I got an email from a friend who pointed out the good coverage the MET office made for February's forecast. Here, read it yourself:

UK Outlook for Monday 6 Feb 2012 to Monday 20 Feb 2012:

The forecast for early February remains very uncertain. There appear to be two main scenarios, each equally probable, but which are very different. The first scenario consists of a changeable westerly or southwesterly weather type with rain at times (amounts greatest in the west), and with temperatures noticeably above average for early February, with only occasional frosts. The alternative scenario is that much colder weather with winds mainly from an easterly or northeasterly quarter, will prevail well into February, bringing widespread frosts and snow to some areas. In this scenario it would be the east that was most vulnerable to snowfall.

So, was there a point? In case your wondering, I'll put your worries to rest, I have a good idea for March, so I took some liberties, illegally branding myself as the Meteorological office and have come up with a rough assumption for the third months weathering:

UK Outlook for March 1^st 2012 to March 31^st 2013

So in March yea, it will begin most probably dark, because it should be starting after midnight on February 29^th. We can’t promise anything, as sometimes there’s an added day in that month. Then it should get a lot lighter towards seven o’ clock, unless it’s cloudy; then you may need to keep your car head lights on till nearer eight. There is also a chance, although maybe not, depends on the galactic weather, of an eclipse so you may need to keep your headlights on till 8.15.

The rest of the day should be fairly overcast with chance of rain and as a result slippery roads.

The alternative scenario is that it could turn out to be a nice, sunny day, with temperatures reaching a max of 38 degrees. Factor 50 Recommended.

The pollen count will be somewhere on the grey scale.

Chance of high winds.

Once upon a time my forecast was going to be posted  in the format of video. We filmed it, but I have no idea when it will be ready for your eyes. And I am too kind to leaving you waiting for any longer. So I thought you could read it, reading is better for you after all.*

There is one thing I've done that is all ready to show you. Here is a video Mam, Dirk, Claire and I made on Saturday:

Courtesy of me. Url: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVHCryThEOM

This is Mam's filming debut. Well done Chaz!

So now we've all discussed the weather, and I linked in my new film, there's nought much else to say. I was thinking about what direction I'm going to take this blog in for 2012. Not that is really ever had a direction before. I was going to go with some sort of improvement programme but I didn't make any New Year's resolutions. I summed it up in fewer than 140 characters on Twitter:

Look Blog, I forgot about Twitter for a while too.

However, earlier this week (Monday) at our Maddrim Media meeting Cara got us to make a Skills Wall, where we write our skills on a pink post-it, and then on a yellow post-it write what skills we'd like to have. Here are my post-its:

Skills I have

Skills I'd like

So. In a gripping tale of adventure and huckleberry finn I'll let you know how that develops.
And my Ipod is well and truly dead. I know because I charged it overnight and nothing happened. I'll try opening it up in the shed later. Actually that would be way more interesting then that skills thing. Yeah! Let's open my Ipod!

See you next time for some core slicing fun.


XXXXXX MARJOLEIN

*Yes that was the lie.

Winter is Coming

A very festive hiyi and also a belated HAPPY SINTERKLAAS, because he has been and gone already on his trusty white steed.

Picture courtesy of: http://elisabethcrisstmas.tumblr.com
I'd say for me Isa - he's pretty much on the same level as Santie.

So I don’t blog much seeing as I rescued my Ipod and now I no longer have a purpose. These situations always get a bit awkward, but being the good British citizen I am I will instead duly turn this discussion towards the weather. It has been snowing of late.

Yes, Hurricane Skunks passed and on the first of December the wind died, it started snowing and we were straight into your typical Wintery evening. It was with that I realised I was not prepared at all... prepared for Christmas!

My favourite Christmas decoration in Shetland.
Yes, he's gripping those branches so hard some have passed out.

I’m still not prepared, I’m getting there... tonight my blog writing is, as usual, a form of procrastination. I’m meant to be writing Christmas cards. It’s like writing essays back at university, only the word count is no more than 15 and you have to write 30 of them. God, I forgot how much I love to procrastinate - you should see how clean my room is. Also I got through 3 comedy DVD’s last night, a mixture of Russell Howard and Frankie Boyle, so I’m currently experiencing everything in a boyish/dour/wonder-filled/foul-mouthed charm. It’s like when you’re constantly reading a book or watching an entire series in one go and you begin to narrate your own life in the style of a certain character/author. Do you get me? Here are some examples:

The Christmas of 2005 my brother was given Arrested Development Season 1 from Santie. (yeah we call him that up here). We watched it repeatedly for days, then for the rest of the holidays it was like living in Sudden Valley. Everything I did was narrated by Ron Howard, every time I left or entered a room it was accompanied by a ukulele and whenever three or more were gathered the inevitable chant of “Speech! Speech!” accompanied by the rhythmic slapping of palms rang in the air.

Halfway through my second year of Uni the film Twilight was unleashed and I bought all the books (?). After reading the first two I began to take on Bella’s traits, as in: round-a-bout paranoia, a deal of self loathing and an extreme lack of coordination. That was a bad period. Luckily the books don’t take long to read and it wasn’t long before I was running around Edinburgh again listening out for the Doctor’s arrival. VWHEEEAAYHH! VWHEEEAAYHH!

Apologies for the digression, I’m a terrible British Citizen.

 One of my favourite genres to read is fantasy and I adore anything with a long and arduous journey, here’s looking at you Tolkien. I’ve really gotten into Game of Thrones; it’s been dominating my life recently. Awesome. However due to the narration, everyone, every-one gets a say in these books. (Wait till you’re on Dance of Dragons, Martin is throwing new characters at you all over the house) So it’s harder to use GOT to narrate my life. What is easy to incorporate into your daily routine is
the practice of using popular phrases from the books/show, such as three and twenty (23) or, my favourite: to break one’s fast. Breaking fast is way better than breakfast and makes me feel like I’m involved in some illegal P cooking with Hal at the same time. When did this turn into a guide of how to incorporate popular culture into your daily life? Or rather: when wasn’t it?


What about the influence of Harry Potter I hear you ask. Well of course. But I've already explained that one (along with Pokémon) here:
http://marjoleinrobertson.blogspot.com/2011/09/11-years-old.html
(linking my own blog. smooth.)

Recently I have been watching Encounters at the End of the World. This is with the hope that soon my life will be narrated by none other than the Werner Herzog.

In case you don’t know who Mr. Herzog is, please, watch this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7kdDeGXUjI

You’re welcome

I’m sure this whole practice is perhaps an example of unstable behaviour and not that healthy.  In future I should probably moderate what I read and watch due to my highly impressionable nature; and it is for that reason (but not that reason alone) I will never, ever, watch A Serbian Film.

Goodnight.

I will miss the moustaches

Ok, I've almost missed Movember. Shiiiit.
But there isn't much time to blog, there's a storm brewing (Mam wants to check her emails) also there is a hurricane soon to hit. I name it Hurricane Skunkydoo; cause Mam won't let me name the new cat Skunkydoo. We are currently debating between Sjakie (pr. Sha-Key) apparently this is Dutch, but then again so is Marjolein, who knows. I wanted Skunkydoo after our Kiwi relation's cat, but that's been wiped off the table most unceremoniously, so I now want Archie, as Archibald is a good strong name. And let's face it, it needs to be a good strong cat if it's going to live side by side with the force that is 'Flippy' (Mam named that cat)

So all this animal chat got us talking... (some more about animals)

Mam started it with talking 'bout the dog to Dad. The dog being a girl, a lovely little lady, named Belle.

(Funny story, our neighbour's dog is also called Belle, ha didn't think that one out, especially when up in the hill working with the sheep... but more on that.. never)

So, and I gotta be quick due to aforementioned stuf.
Mam talked about Belle: "I think he did a poo on his lead"
Me: "His?! She's a woman"
Mam: "Dogs are male and cats female"
(and this carried on)
Mam: "Horses are male and cows female"
(to full circle)
Mam: "Dogs are male and cats female"
Me: "But not in this house? What about other animals? Rats male and mice female?"
Mam: "Yah" (I don't think she heard me but I'm adding this in for comedy value)
Me: "And guinea pigs are all male till one of them ends up pregnant?"
(this guinea pig reference relates to a hilarious period in the Robertson house hold when.they.kept.breeding.)
Mam: "HA HA HA they are hermaphrodites!"


Or something like that. To be honest, November has been a pretty busy and super exciting month. None of which I have told you, but you don't want to read about that. But I will make you anyway. IIIIIIIII went to London, did work experience for Avalon, had our Shetland Improv group's first performance and started filming my new film for Maddrim... it's all exciting but none of it is about animal genders and so therefore, for tonight, has been put on a back burner (Also Ipod is still sitting, waiting patiently, to be turned on.)

Well, as I said, I better go, and I should probably stop typing before I type even more brackets and cause you're eyes to convex to infinity. WHA>!!!1

5,203,921,789

Yes that is my ranking in the world. Out of 7 billion. Not bad, but I'm not sure what good is.


Last time I 'blogged' (there was no need for parenthesis I know I just hate that word.)
Yes. Last time I 'blogged' here was when I was busy desalting my ipod. I kept that process up for about 2 days and changing the water when saline levels made it undrinkable. Since it's been drying in rice, then in a bag with some more (boil in the bag) rice and a silicone packet and I've not tried turning it on.

Boil in the bag Ipod (highly impractical due to silicone packet)

 When I'll try to work it I'll let you know.


What I should tell you is a story I started but never finished way back on the 2nd October:

 What happened to the otter?
*SPOILER* We freed it.

But enough of all this maritime-otter-rescuing-Ipod-abondoning ridiculousness, it has plagued this blog for too long. This used to be a place where I posted old notes from Facebook. Those were the carefree ctrl+c then ctrl+v days.

To new matters at hand. I've not been here in a while, I've been busy, I got to go to the "Youth Volunteering Achievement Awards" on  Tuesday, which included a buffet (but no mozzarella sticks) and, thanks to Maddrim's nomination for an award, sneak into the group photo. Willem is to the right of me with Maddrim's actual nomination, and Ceidiog and I are on either side modelling our free mints. I got 6 packets. Ceidiog got 8. Thank you Rotary Club!

Then on Monday, this is not chronological, I got to see Ed Byrne as he preformed his current show Crowd Pleaser in the Clickimin Centre. Very much enjoyed the show. Highlights for me included: his retelling of when he met the Commander of the Starship Reliant in an airport; his 5 views on a boy wearing a certain 50cent t shirt and his tale of confusion with Craig Campbell (Who also came up here and rocked the Isles). However my favourite joke was a quick addition to a longer story:

"I've never been a big cat person, but then I've never been bitten by a radioactive cat"

He's a fellow geek. Which he himself declared in the show. He proclaimed his love for DnD and when talking to him after the show about the game I realised I really need to get my blog on. My new blog. For my DnD game. It's going to be more an epic tale of quests and adventure but I'll write it in the guise of a blog, cause I'm 21st century like that.

Ed and I

Should also just say a big thank you to Mr. Ed Byrne (because he reads this? HA) but he came up here, tirelessly gave an amazing show, was happy to come and talk to everyone after and is Be Nerdy.

So that is what I've been up to.
Isn't this like when you're back in Primary School and someone has there show and tell? Yes. Yes it is. Which reminds me. Show and Tell is on tonight. Television.

Marjolein used Scuba Diver - it's super effective!

Rescued Ipod

YES!


The long struggle is over. Call me Captain Ahab, no Commodore, no actually I haven't read Moby Dick and I have a bad feeling about the end of it. Yes, yesterday, Sunday the 17th October, we finally fished my Ipod out form the treacherous North Atlantic Ocean.



Sorry I didn't blog about this yesterday, the parents are away this weekend and I'm looking after the house so I had to cook, tidy, wash clothes, look after the animals and then went over to my friends to play Dungeons and Dragons for 3 hours. We've just started up, we've got a halfling Danny, I can't remember his characters name. Theo was some sort of cat being but we couldn't find the second sheet for his character's traits so he got swtiched to a half elf who is surprisingly clumsy and I'm a female dwarf warrior called Reuben.

So, Ipod fishing. Now I can tell you how to do it. We had a 9 person strong team. Well no, we had 9 people there, but 6 were spectators. Mark, Mhia and I got in the water to fish for it the third time. So really you need about 3 persons, or four, it's good for a dry spectator to hold the camera.

Mark and Mhia

It took about 50 minutes of diving, well Mark diving and Mhia and I splashing around, silting up the water. It was only after a 10 minute break to allow the water to clear that Mark found it. Tricky thing being the water was still pretty heavily silted, sorry Mark, so he was basically swimming along the bottom picking up everything he could find to see if he felt the leather case of the Ipod.

And here is the most triumphant moment (of just after - no one really remembered to film we were all that excited)

To be honest everyone is just so overwhelmed there.

So the next challenge is to get this baby working again.
I turned to Yahoo Answers in a bid to gain some knowledge on the situation. Yahoo answers is a goldmine for fun, I can't believe I've not been on that sooner. It's as good as typing in the first half of a question on google.

Examples of never ending fun on Google:

How did metal even get there?

So to my question, I thought I'd just throw it at the general public, someone else is bound to have done the same. So I asked:

"How do you fix a 4th generation Ipod after it has been in the North Atlantic Sea for a month?
It was in a leather (but not waterproof) case"

 Answers were pretty varied, actually no, they were all pretty intent on it being broken forever. Whatevs. No one even suggested rice. I know way more than these. Apart from one:

 "Robbert Michel

Get a ticket to Cardiff (Wales) and wait for Doctor Who to come along (Drives a classic British blue phone box marked “Police”). Then travel back in time to stop yourself from dropping the iPod in the Atlantic Ocean.

One warning though:
This solution can cause severe problems with causality, and may lead to sudden inter-dimensional collapse. It’s probably easier and cheaper to buy a new one.

Source(s):

http://www.bbc.co.uk/doctorwho/dw
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006m8ln"

Cheers Robert.


I've already started  first the desalting process (next will be drying in rice):

Strategically placed pine cone

And if this doesn't work I'll put it in some sort of glass vessel and hang it from the wall.

Yours sincerely
Reuben.

P.S Ah before I forget big thank you to everyone who has helped: Karen Radford, Mark Simmons, Mhia Mouat, Theo Mouat, Lyndon Mouat and Nell and Malcolm Robertson for letting us use their pier for searching from those many, many three times. And also thank you to all the well wishes on facebook/twitter/real life. Cheers!

Update on the fishing business

This going to be a short entry because I've still got to write the improv ideas film for Maddrim.

Multi tasking just now, blogging and watching Back to the Future. Fuck it's awesome. The set up for the rest of the film in the car park when Doc explains time travel is so well done. Sorry, getting distracted, I'll mute it, no wait, the main theme is about to kick in when he's about to reach 88mph... I'll just turn the volume down, a bit.

So to the main reason for the blog: fishing.

I never should have written that last blog with the section 'how to fish for your ipod' as I didn't catch it that time and I sure as hell didn't this time. Guess Poseidon's enjoying my full discography of the Dixie Chicks just too much to give it back.

(Ad break - now I'm watching Groundhog Day. Ghad I love a bit of Murray.)

 

 So yes, my first attempt I went out in my boat with a net, this time I donned my wetsuit, goggles and snorkle, and took the net too just for some banter.

Here I am to your right, looking optimistic. Fool.

It's hard to see in this photo, but it was pretty windy, it was gusting up to f7 and it was cold. The water was murky, the sea floor muddy and I was just making it alot worse by splashing around in the cold.

There, down below, that's me splashing around in the cold.




But to cut this short, because it's too painful to write, and Back To The Future finished long, long ago, I caught nothing, apart from perhaps a cold. We'll see!

But this is not the end. There is going to be a third attempt; my neighbour Theo, is going to help me with his underwater torch... Again, damn the black leather case.

I will fish it out eventually, I will.




Big thank you to Karen Raford who drove me to the pier and photographer my efforts. I couldn't have failed a second time without her. We also had other fun adventures this past weekend that I will blog about soon.


I should also like to say RIP to Steve Jobs. This adventure would have never begun without him. If I do catch it eventually it will be the voyage dedicated to him.

It's been a long time

to get from there to here...

But seriously, I'm sorry I haven't posted here in a while, I started this blog with such good intentions; but the best laid plans and all that, I haven't posted in a while. That is until I'm meant to plan something for tomorrow and then I need to procrastinate and writing in this blog is the form of procrastination I am taking today. Not going to complain it is (sort of) productive.

But yes as I said I'm meant to be planning something, that would be a Creative Ideas Workshop for Maddrim Media Club's meeting tomorrow. Mainly there's going to be a lot of improv games and then discussions for future ideas. So I'm busy doing that, starting a new job at work, setting up an improv group and fishing for my ipod. But I'm only going to expand on one of those stories now so naturally I'll choose the last.


How to fish for your Ipod
I probably shouldn't be writing a guide on this seeing as I haven't caught it yet. Instead this should be more of a story of woe and a warning to never take your Ipod with you when going for a row.

Look this is me rowing on the voe, I really love a good row:

Note: No Ipod

To cut a pretty long story short, I went for a row, neighbours ended up joining me, four of us in two boats when to investigate a strange squeaking noise - it was an otter stuck in a lobster creel, during all the commotion trying to free the otter owners swapped boats, some people were on the pier, my ipod was left in my boat, which was then accidentally capsized resulting in a soaked neighbour and a sunken MP3 player.

My lovely, now dry, neighbour then bought me a replacement Ipod. But I still really want to fish out my old one. For three reasons:

1) It may, just may, still work, which would be a miracle
2) How many people can say they've caught a saltwater Ipod?
3) I want to put it in a bottle and hang it on my wall. That'd just be fucking awesome.

So after purchasing a 99p net from my brother's local corner shop I took my row boat out yesterday, minus my new ipod but plus one wet suit (prepared) and went fishing!
I spent two hours hanging over my boat... I did see it, almost had it, then it evaded me and I was unable to spot it again as it is in a leather case, which was actually also a present from the same neighbour.

I didn't realise at the time, because I was super busy fishing, but family and neighbours were watching and laughing and tweeting about me. Bit mean.

Yes I retweeted it

But yea I am dry now, and warm, but I can't rest knowing my Ipod (oh so wittingly named 'Marjolein's Pithus of Music' d'ya get it? Soz for the vulgarity) is still at the bottom of our voe. So this week I'm going to be borrowing my brother's snorkle gear and have a second attempt. Failing that I'll upgrade to scuba diving gear from my friend Mark. Best be soon winter is coming. Although with this lovely Indian Summer it's not that bad a problem. Indian Summer in Shetland we hit 17 degrees and people didn't know how to cope.

I've got to go, I'm uploading a film I made in 6th year of school, to Youtube. I'll maybe blog about it one day. It's a tribute to Steve Irwin. What a legend.