You don't know the pain of building a robot with Christopher Walken...

....Is probably the best piece of artwork I have ever seen on the internet. Nay, it is the best.
(There is a secret message in this blog. See if you can find it)

Thank you Brandon Bird for painting this in 2004. Online image source: http://laughingsquid.com/

After working with paint to create my collage in my last blog I was reminded about the days and nights I spent on that programe working on masterpieces. Recently I have been staying in town because of the bad weather. This one is called Bawbags: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hurricane_Bawbag
I myself would have called it Skunkydoo the Sequel.

So, while at my brothers we thought this would be a good time to write Christmas cards to all our Dutch relations. Instead we played on paint and made gifs.

This blog isn't going to be very long. I just want to you show you all the pretty things we made.

It all began with a story. Oh, I should give you some context:

When I was 11.

When I was 11 I was really into the Harry Potter books, well I still am
(for further information read: http://marjoleinrobertson.blogspot.com/2011/09/11-years-old.html hmmmm, where have I seen this linked before? How about HERE: http://marjoleinrobertson.blogspot.com/2011/12/winter-is-coming.html I push, I push.)
 It was about that time they started working on the films too. I wanted to be Hermione. I spent much time and effort writing a letter to the Studios asking to play her, and every other female character in the books, ever.

The list of characters I could play was something like this:
Hermione Granger
Lavender Brown
Hannah Abbott
Ginny Weasley
Angelina Johnson
Padma Patil
Parvati Patil
Katie Bell
Mrs Weasley (and I'm not even ginger)

So I thought I'd be helpful and include my details in the letter: hair colour (but I'd happily dye that) eye colour (I'm comfortable with contacts) height (for costume) and head circumference (for my witches hat). It was at that last one where my brother couldn't read my letter anymore for laughing. But I'd written it in pen, didn't have Tipex and knew I should send it straight away (because they had already cast Hermione. Wha)

So anyway, the rest of the story isn't as interesting, but someone at work had to measure their head circumference, by now I have been conditioned to believe that is a ridiculous practice. And I had to bite my hand not to laugh. Somewhere between acting out the story and recreating my pose on paint we decided to draw it on paint. I can't remember how. But I'll skip the image. Now one is drawn by me and the other by Dirk.

Which one is more like me?

The idea of the competition was to represent someone, but you're not allowed to delete any mistakes.
(I drew the one with the nosebleed)

Next we drew Drik:

(Secret message: This blog was actually written on Thursday 8th.)

His pose was from a story at work when his boss fell over. As you may have guessed by our choice of tool Dirk's is the thick pen.We swapped them around to keep  you on your toes. SUPRISE.

Then we made gifs. Are they working? Maybe not. If you want to view them, and more, and some still scans of drawings Dirk made (and stole) go here: http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y1/dirkhead/

I'm sorry for this blog.

Winter is Coming

A very festive hiyi and also a belated HAPPY SINTERKLAAS, because he has been and gone already on his trusty white steed.

Picture courtesy of: http://elisabethcrisstmas.tumblr.com
I'd say for me Isa - he's pretty much on the same level as Santie.

So I don’t blog much seeing as I rescued my Ipod and now I no longer have a purpose. These situations always get a bit awkward, but being the good British citizen I am I will instead duly turn this discussion towards the weather. It has been snowing of late.

Yes, Hurricane Skunks passed and on the first of December the wind died, it started snowing and we were straight into your typical Wintery evening. It was with that I realised I was not prepared at all... prepared for Christmas!

My favourite Christmas decoration in Shetland.
Yes, he's gripping those branches so hard some have passed out.

I’m still not prepared, I’m getting there... tonight my blog writing is, as usual, a form of procrastination. I’m meant to be writing Christmas cards. It’s like writing essays back at university, only the word count is no more than 15 and you have to write 30 of them. God, I forgot how much I love to procrastinate - you should see how clean my room is. Also I got through 3 comedy DVD’s last night, a mixture of Russell Howard and Frankie Boyle, so I’m currently experiencing everything in a boyish/dour/wonder-filled/foul-mouthed charm. It’s like when you’re constantly reading a book or watching an entire series in one go and you begin to narrate your own life in the style of a certain character/author. Do you get me? Here are some examples:

The Christmas of 2005 my brother was given Arrested Development Season 1 from Santie. (yeah we call him that up here). We watched it repeatedly for days, then for the rest of the holidays it was like living in Sudden Valley. Everything I did was narrated by Ron Howard, every time I left or entered a room it was accompanied by a ukulele and whenever three or more were gathered the inevitable chant of “Speech! Speech!” accompanied by the rhythmic slapping of palms rang in the air.

Halfway through my second year of Uni the film Twilight was unleashed and I bought all the books (?). After reading the first two I began to take on Bella’s traits, as in: round-a-bout paranoia, a deal of self loathing and an extreme lack of coordination. That was a bad period. Luckily the books don’t take long to read and it wasn’t long before I was running around Edinburgh again listening out for the Doctor’s arrival. VWHEEEAAYHH! VWHEEEAAYHH!

Apologies for the digression, I’m a terrible British Citizen.

 One of my favourite genres to read is fantasy and I adore anything with a long and arduous journey, here’s looking at you Tolkien. I’ve really gotten into Game of Thrones; it’s been dominating my life recently. Awesome. However due to the narration, everyone, every-one gets a say in these books. (Wait till you’re on Dance of Dragons, Martin is throwing new characters at you all over the house) So it’s harder to use GOT to narrate my life. What is easy to incorporate into your daily routine is
the practice of using popular phrases from the books/show, such as three and twenty (23) or, my favourite: to break one’s fast. Breaking fast is way better than breakfast and makes me feel like I’m involved in some illegal P cooking with Hal at the same time. When did this turn into a guide of how to incorporate popular culture into your daily life? Or rather: when wasn’t it?


What about the influence of Harry Potter I hear you ask. Well of course. But I've already explained that one (along with Pokémon) here:
http://marjoleinrobertson.blogspot.com/2011/09/11-years-old.html
(linking my own blog. smooth.)

Recently I have been watching Encounters at the End of the World. This is with the hope that soon my life will be narrated by none other than the Werner Herzog.

In case you don’t know who Mr. Herzog is, please, watch this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7kdDeGXUjI

You’re welcome

I’m sure this whole practice is perhaps an example of unstable behaviour and not that healthy.  In future I should probably moderate what I read and watch due to my highly impressionable nature; and it is for that reason (but not that reason alone) I will never, ever, watch A Serbian Film.

Goodnight.

I will miss the moustaches

Ok, I've almost missed Movember. Shiiiit.
But there isn't much time to blog, there's a storm brewing (Mam wants to check her emails) also there is a hurricane soon to hit. I name it Hurricane Skunkydoo; cause Mam won't let me name the new cat Skunkydoo. We are currently debating between Sjakie (pr. Sha-Key) apparently this is Dutch, but then again so is Marjolein, who knows. I wanted Skunkydoo after our Kiwi relation's cat, but that's been wiped off the table most unceremoniously, so I now want Archie, as Archibald is a good strong name. And let's face it, it needs to be a good strong cat if it's going to live side by side with the force that is 'Flippy' (Mam named that cat)

So all this animal chat got us talking... (some more about animals)

Mam started it with talking 'bout the dog to Dad. The dog being a girl, a lovely little lady, named Belle.

(Funny story, our neighbour's dog is also called Belle, ha didn't think that one out, especially when up in the hill working with the sheep... but more on that.. never)

So, and I gotta be quick due to aforementioned stuf.
Mam talked about Belle: "I think he did a poo on his lead"
Me: "His?! She's a woman"
Mam: "Dogs are male and cats female"
(and this carried on)
Mam: "Horses are male and cows female"
(to full circle)
Mam: "Dogs are male and cats female"
Me: "But not in this house? What about other animals? Rats male and mice female?"
Mam: "Yah" (I don't think she heard me but I'm adding this in for comedy value)
Me: "And guinea pigs are all male till one of them ends up pregnant?"
(this guinea pig reference relates to a hilarious period in the Robertson house hold when.they.kept.breeding.)
Mam: "HA HA HA they are hermaphrodites!"


Or something like that. To be honest, November has been a pretty busy and super exciting month. None of which I have told you, but you don't want to read about that. But I will make you anyway. IIIIIIIII went to London, did work experience for Avalon, had our Shetland Improv group's first performance and started filming my new film for Maddrim... it's all exciting but none of it is about animal genders and so therefore, for tonight, has been put on a back burner (Also Ipod is still sitting, waiting patiently, to be turned on.)

Well, as I said, I better go, and I should probably stop typing before I type even more brackets and cause you're eyes to convex to infinity. WHA>!!!1

5,203,921,789

Yes that is my ranking in the world. Out of 7 billion. Not bad, but I'm not sure what good is.


Last time I 'blogged' (there was no need for parenthesis I know I just hate that word.)
Yes. Last time I 'blogged' here was when I was busy desalting my ipod. I kept that process up for about 2 days and changing the water when saline levels made it undrinkable. Since it's been drying in rice, then in a bag with some more (boil in the bag) rice and a silicone packet and I've not tried turning it on.

Boil in the bag Ipod (highly impractical due to silicone packet)

 When I'll try to work it I'll let you know.


What I should tell you is a story I started but never finished way back on the 2nd October:

 What happened to the otter?
*SPOILER* We freed it.

But enough of all this maritime-otter-rescuing-Ipod-abondoning ridiculousness, it has plagued this blog for too long. This used to be a place where I posted old notes from Facebook. Those were the carefree ctrl+c then ctrl+v days.

To new matters at hand. I've not been here in a while, I've been busy, I got to go to the "Youth Volunteering Achievement Awards" on  Tuesday, which included a buffet (but no mozzarella sticks) and, thanks to Maddrim's nomination for an award, sneak into the group photo. Willem is to the right of me with Maddrim's actual nomination, and Ceidiog and I are on either side modelling our free mints. I got 6 packets. Ceidiog got 8. Thank you Rotary Club!

Then on Monday, this is not chronological, I got to see Ed Byrne as he preformed his current show Crowd Pleaser in the Clickimin Centre. Very much enjoyed the show. Highlights for me included: his retelling of when he met the Commander of the Starship Reliant in an airport; his 5 views on a boy wearing a certain 50cent t shirt and his tale of confusion with Craig Campbell (Who also came up here and rocked the Isles). However my favourite joke was a quick addition to a longer story:

"I've never been a big cat person, but then I've never been bitten by a radioactive cat"

He's a fellow geek. Which he himself declared in the show. He proclaimed his love for DnD and when talking to him after the show about the game I realised I really need to get my blog on. My new blog. For my DnD game. It's going to be more an epic tale of quests and adventure but I'll write it in the guise of a blog, cause I'm 21st century like that.

Ed and I

Should also just say a big thank you to Mr. Ed Byrne (because he reads this? HA) but he came up here, tirelessly gave an amazing show, was happy to come and talk to everyone after and is Be Nerdy.

So that is what I've been up to.
Isn't this like when you're back in Primary School and someone has there show and tell? Yes. Yes it is. Which reminds me. Show and Tell is on tonight. Television.

Marjolein used Scuba Diver - it's super effective!

Rescued Ipod

YES!


The long struggle is over. Call me Captain Ahab, no Commodore, no actually I haven't read Moby Dick and I have a bad feeling about the end of it. Yes, yesterday, Sunday the 17th October, we finally fished my Ipod out form the treacherous North Atlantic Ocean.



Sorry I didn't blog about this yesterday, the parents are away this weekend and I'm looking after the house so I had to cook, tidy, wash clothes, look after the animals and then went over to my friends to play Dungeons and Dragons for 3 hours. We've just started up, we've got a halfling Danny, I can't remember his characters name. Theo was some sort of cat being but we couldn't find the second sheet for his character's traits so he got swtiched to a half elf who is surprisingly clumsy and I'm a female dwarf warrior called Reuben.

So, Ipod fishing. Now I can tell you how to do it. We had a 9 person strong team. Well no, we had 9 people there, but 6 were spectators. Mark, Mhia and I got in the water to fish for it the third time. So really you need about 3 persons, or four, it's good for a dry spectator to hold the camera.

Mark and Mhia

It took about 50 minutes of diving, well Mark diving and Mhia and I splashing around, silting up the water. It was only after a 10 minute break to allow the water to clear that Mark found it. Tricky thing being the water was still pretty heavily silted, sorry Mark, so he was basically swimming along the bottom picking up everything he could find to see if he felt the leather case of the Ipod.

And here is the most triumphant moment (of just after - no one really remembered to film we were all that excited)

To be honest everyone is just so overwhelmed there.

So the next challenge is to get this baby working again.
I turned to Yahoo Answers in a bid to gain some knowledge on the situation. Yahoo answers is a goldmine for fun, I can't believe I've not been on that sooner. It's as good as typing in the first half of a question on google.

Examples of never ending fun on Google:

How did metal even get there?

So to my question, I thought I'd just throw it at the general public, someone else is bound to have done the same. So I asked:

"How do you fix a 4th generation Ipod after it has been in the North Atlantic Sea for a month?
It was in a leather (but not waterproof) case"

 Answers were pretty varied, actually no, they were all pretty intent on it being broken forever. Whatevs. No one even suggested rice. I know way more than these. Apart from one:

 "Robbert Michel

Get a ticket to Cardiff (Wales) and wait for Doctor Who to come along (Drives a classic British blue phone box marked “Police”). Then travel back in time to stop yourself from dropping the iPod in the Atlantic Ocean.

One warning though:
This solution can cause severe problems with causality, and may lead to sudden inter-dimensional collapse. It’s probably easier and cheaper to buy a new one.

Source(s):

http://www.bbc.co.uk/doctorwho/dw
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006m8ln"

Cheers Robert.


I've already started  first the desalting process (next will be drying in rice):

Strategically placed pine cone

And if this doesn't work I'll put it in some sort of glass vessel and hang it from the wall.

Yours sincerely
Reuben.

P.S Ah before I forget big thank you to everyone who has helped: Karen Radford, Mark Simmons, Mhia Mouat, Theo Mouat, Lyndon Mouat and Nell and Malcolm Robertson for letting us use their pier for searching from those many, many three times. And also thank you to all the well wishes on facebook/twitter/real life. Cheers!

Update on the fishing business

This going to be a short entry because I've still got to write the improv ideas film for Maddrim.

Multi tasking just now, blogging and watching Back to the Future. Fuck it's awesome. The set up for the rest of the film in the car park when Doc explains time travel is so well done. Sorry, getting distracted, I'll mute it, no wait, the main theme is about to kick in when he's about to reach 88mph... I'll just turn the volume down, a bit.

So to the main reason for the blog: fishing.

I never should have written that last blog with the section 'how to fish for your ipod' as I didn't catch it that time and I sure as hell didn't this time. Guess Poseidon's enjoying my full discography of the Dixie Chicks just too much to give it back.

(Ad break - now I'm watching Groundhog Day. Ghad I love a bit of Murray.)

 

 So yes, my first attempt I went out in my boat with a net, this time I donned my wetsuit, goggles and snorkle, and took the net too just for some banter.

Here I am to your right, looking optimistic. Fool.

It's hard to see in this photo, but it was pretty windy, it was gusting up to f7 and it was cold. The water was murky, the sea floor muddy and I was just making it alot worse by splashing around in the cold.

There, down below, that's me splashing around in the cold.




But to cut this short, because it's too painful to write, and Back To The Future finished long, long ago, I caught nothing, apart from perhaps a cold. We'll see!

But this is not the end. There is going to be a third attempt; my neighbour Theo, is going to help me with his underwater torch... Again, damn the black leather case.

I will fish it out eventually, I will.




Big thank you to Karen Raford who drove me to the pier and photographer my efforts. I couldn't have failed a second time without her. We also had other fun adventures this past weekend that I will blog about soon.


I should also like to say RIP to Steve Jobs. This adventure would have never begun without him. If I do catch it eventually it will be the voyage dedicated to him.

It's been a long time

to get from there to here...

But seriously, I'm sorry I haven't posted here in a while, I started this blog with such good intentions; but the best laid plans and all that, I haven't posted in a while. That is until I'm meant to plan something for tomorrow and then I need to procrastinate and writing in this blog is the form of procrastination I am taking today. Not going to complain it is (sort of) productive.

But yes as I said I'm meant to be planning something, that would be a Creative Ideas Workshop for Maddrim Media Club's meeting tomorrow. Mainly there's going to be a lot of improv games and then discussions for future ideas. So I'm busy doing that, starting a new job at work, setting up an improv group and fishing for my ipod. But I'm only going to expand on one of those stories now so naturally I'll choose the last.


How to fish for your Ipod
I probably shouldn't be writing a guide on this seeing as I haven't caught it yet. Instead this should be more of a story of woe and a warning to never take your Ipod with you when going for a row.

Look this is me rowing on the voe, I really love a good row:

Note: No Ipod

To cut a pretty long story short, I went for a row, neighbours ended up joining me, four of us in two boats when to investigate a strange squeaking noise - it was an otter stuck in a lobster creel, during all the commotion trying to free the otter owners swapped boats, some people were on the pier, my ipod was left in my boat, which was then accidentally capsized resulting in a soaked neighbour and a sunken MP3 player.

My lovely, now dry, neighbour then bought me a replacement Ipod. But I still really want to fish out my old one. For three reasons:

1) It may, just may, still work, which would be a miracle
2) How many people can say they've caught a saltwater Ipod?
3) I want to put it in a bottle and hang it on my wall. That'd just be fucking awesome.

So after purchasing a 99p net from my brother's local corner shop I took my row boat out yesterday, minus my new ipod but plus one wet suit (prepared) and went fishing!
I spent two hours hanging over my boat... I did see it, almost had it, then it evaded me and I was unable to spot it again as it is in a leather case, which was actually also a present from the same neighbour.

I didn't realise at the time, because I was super busy fishing, but family and neighbours were watching and laughing and tweeting about me. Bit mean.

Yes I retweeted it

But yea I am dry now, and warm, but I can't rest knowing my Ipod (oh so wittingly named 'Marjolein's Pithus of Music' d'ya get it? Soz for the vulgarity) is still at the bottom of our voe. So this week I'm going to be borrowing my brother's snorkle gear and have a second attempt. Failing that I'll upgrade to scuba diving gear from my friend Mark. Best be soon winter is coming. Although with this lovely Indian Summer it's not that bad a problem. Indian Summer in Shetland we hit 17 degrees and people didn't know how to cope.

I've got to go, I'm uploading a film I made in 6th year of school, to Youtube. I'll maybe blog about it one day. It's a tribute to Steve Irwin. What a legend.

Hiyi Blogger

I've made a blog and now I'm blogging.

If you care to look below you'll see a whole heap (5) of blogs. These are ones that sat in my Facebook Notes section for a long time. (They're dated) I wanted to air them a bit, and let other folks than my friends read them. I've not touched them, made any corrections or even added pictures (to be honest the only one that was hard no to do was the last of those, so they are as authentic as they day they were typed.*

A quick introduction to me: I recently graduated from the University of Edinburgh, which you can see in my 'about me' I am still working in my summer time employment that is due to end soon.. so I'm trying to sort out what I want to do with the rest of my life. Hence the blog. There, sorted. And the best thing is I had all those posts just waiting to be ctrl-C'd up here. great. job done. I'll write something when I have some news.

Quick question - does the return key mess up your blogs too? This text box can't handle it when I enter.

But to my news, I have some, the most exciting thing I have done recently is make a film, a mocumentary no less on the workings of a society within an insular community. The society within the film 'The Society' is 'The Adam Hart-Davis Appreciation Society'. You may know who he is, you may not, for now it does not matter, but I urge you to seek him out, he is one of the most informative and delightful presenters I have had the pleasure to watch. As ridiculous or harrowing as 'The Society' gets it is a homage to Mr Hart-Davis, whom I really am a fan of. I'll even go so far as to label myself an oik, again. (see video)

First aired at Screeplay's 'Home Made In Shetland' on Thursday 1st September 2011. "It was very funny" - Mark Kermode. (approached during his second tin of Tennents. Clever)

Clipping from 'Home Made In Shetland' programme. Thanks BB.

Directed - Marjolein Robertson & Willem Cluness
Edited - Willem Cluness & Marjolein Robertson
Filmed - Willem Cluness, Annie Mckee & Marjolein Robertson
Written - Marjolein Robertson, Willem Cluness & John Haswell
Original concept - Dirk Robertson & Marjolein Robertson
Thanks to - Shetland Arts Trust & The Gruting School

 Now watch The Society- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6UiYU_hmmU




*I didn't even add 'Labels' which was probably a stupid idea and I'm going to do that as soon as I finish this post.

I don't really want to do this but.

by Marjolein Robertson on Friday, May 20, 2011 at 9:14pm

I thought I should spend one last moment of my degree procrastinating, just to write this note you know, otherwise I'd actually be working.

 Usually there is something on my mind to prompt me to write something like this, like my thoughts on Eurovision last time.

It's all cool I did get to see it. Although THE Netherlands weren't actually in the final so I looked pretty stupid in my Dutch strip and flag painted face. But then I probably looked more ridiculous in Niki's bright blue tights and Angry's orange XL long tee in Prow. I'm not sure. And to be honest after watching the Eurovision Song Contest I've been left with many more questions then I'd started with. Also everytime I'm guessing the countries of Europe on Sporcle now I try Azerbaijan at least three times. God bless Eurovision.


To be honest I have nothing to say. Nothing at all. In fact I want to go back to my desk, away from a computer and read. I suppose this is it, I've finally grown up at 22 and a day with over 19 hours of my degree to go. Going to sign of then and carry on revising.




But first I think I'll go for a really long plank in a corridor somewhere.

I'm revising and these are my thoughts:

by Marjolein Robertson on Wednesday, April 27, 2011 at 9:11pm

 Woah woah woah woah have I missed this years Eurovision Song Contest?
No. Thank god.
Jedward for Ireland?
Anyone, ANYONE can actually send in their own song.
Why is Holland under 'T'?
'The Netherlands'. The.
Fuck this Eurovision you've already blown my mind.

11 years old

by Marjolein Robertson on Tuesday, April 19, 2011 at 5:58pm

Yes. 11. We've all been there, unless you are 10 and under and then why are you on facebook? Why?


But yea, being 11. I don't know what you were into then but I'm going to presume most of you were massive Harry Potter geeks and were all patiently waiting on your owl from Albus. And I bet most of you too hoped that secretly you were at least half witch/wizard, your parents just decided not to let you in the know until it was time to head down to Diog-A and see Ollivander for your wand and then learn to use your (force) magic responsibly under the watchful eyes of the Hogwarts professors.

Yea I waited for that letter. And then when September arrived (by this time I was 11 and 4 months) I ran out my house, up the hill, and shouted to the heavens (pretty fitting because seeing as this was now 2000 that is where old Alby was by then residing) "I'M READY DUMBLEDORE, I'M READY TO GO TO HOGWARTS AND BECOME A WITCH!"
I bet you all did that too.


But that's not what being 11 is all about. No it is not.

Another wish I had, I prayed for, albeit, a little less realistic, was to leave home with a rucksack on my back full of empty Pokéballs and the ambition to become the world's greatest POKÉMON MASTER!
Achievable.

I really hoped by then they would have harnessed technology with the ability to capture and store animals electronically, cocooning them until it was time to release them purely to fight the opponent. I already had a little menagerie of three able bodied animals, lucky pets. The ultimate dream of course to head over to Japan and step into Pallet Town and realise, in a wash of grey scale and 2-D vision that this was what life was.

The premise of the game is actually as crazy as many other Nintendo story lines. Think of Mario, a plumber who on getting sucked into the pipes he's trying to fix ends up in a world of evil turtles and dinosaurs who keep stealing the Mushroom Kingdom's Princess, who is luckily a babe, otherwise it'd be pretty awkward when you FINALLY get to the right castle to bag her yourself and you discover she's a mushroom.

Yea now think of Pokémon - at the age of 11 any kid who wants to can leave home and travel from town to town, sleeping rough, capturing wild animals, training them, making them fight and hopefully earning some cash in the process.
That shit is messed up. And that shit is what I wanted to embark on when I was 11.

Thoughts when writing my dissertation

 by Marjolein Robertson on Wednesday, February 23, 2011 at 5:17pm

I've been thinking about faces a lot recently, no not faces, poses, people's face poses. THANKS ALOT EUSA ELECTIONS.
I'm so distracted.
So anyway, I was thinking a lot about people's common photo pose when on Guardian website and I couldn't help but look at Charlie Brooker for a long, long time.

I don’t mean to poke fun at Charlie Brooker no it’s just that he is a prime example of having ‘a face’. From picture to picture, book cover to book cover.. or is he only on ‘Dawn of the Dumb’ whatever it is he always looks serious, but a bit pissed off and then slightly confused, as if he quite likes that shit that he's hating on so much on tv. Which I think he is getting at in every write up he writes up (imaginative english skillz)

Perhaps though, having ‘a face’ is a good idea. Think of Marilyn Monroe, yea, exactly you have no problem remembering her face, it’s iconic, probably through Warhol garishly (not that I don’t like it) repeatedly burning it into our retinas (which I’m not complaining about).

In fact, take someone like, say, no actually. Let’s take Lady Gaga. Everyone knows her. Or at least they know her costumes, you can sort of imagine her face, pretty sure she is (usually) blonde, has a distinct nose and huge black voids for eyes. I think, the problem with her face is it changes too much/hidden more often than not with all manner of things. Wait I forgot my point... SKIP TO THE END:

‘the face’ (if a good one): is great, it will create an image of you for all time, think about that EUSA candidates
Lady Gaga: I will never remember what she looks like, in my head is a mix of raw meat (waste) netting, telephones, Beyonce (hawt) and messsss.



Actually no, scrap everything I just wrote - I will remember what she looks like for eternity because I just remembered she looks like an egg.

You think you procrastinate?

by Marjolein Robertson on Sunday, February 28, 2010 at 7:55pm

 

So I have taken to writing a ‘note’ this is a new form of procrastination I have not experienced before (save my ‘facts about me’ but those along with questionnaires have been filling my time since I was 13.) No today I’m writing about how I feel the coming to the library is pretty much (if not exactly) the same to as climbing a mountain, say Everest.

Now I have never been up Everest but I’m pretty sure the process is all pretty much the same as the steps in this analogy. Oh and I saw a documentary once, a while back, on some mountaineers up Everest. So I’m sure enough qualified in the matter. So, on I go with my analogy of the similarities between climbing Everest and studying in the University of Edinburgh library.

(Sorry about my poor introduction, but you’re going to have to get used to my rubbish writing style!)

Firstly, you have to travel to the library, you may live close to it, and you may live far (as in bus ride’) away. I live a decent length of time by walking and I have to accommodate my time to get to the old bibliotheque carefully; as I would if I was travelling to the Himalayas. (Spot any differences thus far? No, I thought not.)

Next you need your student card to get into the library; or in the Everest expedition case: your passport. This whole process is similar to customs – you try and smuggle anything into this building (a grande caramel latte with 3 shots of coffee) and you will get caught by the security.

Then we have to stock up supplies. Oh we’re not total idiots (all the time) we (usually) arrive at the library with our most essential needs, the usual list is:
LIBRARY CARD
Pens
Paper
Water
Mobile Phone
Slippers (seriously try it once you’ll never go back)
Pen drive

However the library too provides us with necessities:
HUB RESERVE BOOKS
And
MALTEASERS
(You will need money for the latter)

So before we can begin the ascent we have to make sure we have what we need. However as soon as we have our supplies we must make sure to complete this epic voyage before they run out (3 hours) so onwards and upwards with our journey!

(There are also library/mountaineering experts at ‘ground base’ who will help you. And if you’re lucky you may meet them on your way should you ever need assistance.)

One of my favourite aspects of travelling is meeting other visitors and discussing our experiences, sharing travel tips and generally laughing (often remorsefully) about the drunken night before. So as we journey up through the bases remember to allow time for chatting to all the other students.

Now I’m not sure how computers fit into my analogy but I’m pretty certain you couldn’t go the whole 2 weeks* it takes to get up and down old Everest without Facebook… you need to update your status about it, and profile picture, and comment on your friends page about your ‘super time!’ and then look who else has commented on their page. Then check those people out and oh! They have new pictures of their puppy! – Didn’t even know they had a one! Well I do know, and how enriched my life is for looking at an unfocussed photo of their 7 month old Labrador looking away from the camera!... I wonder if my crops are ready to harvest on Farmville?
God bless facebook.

Where were we? Ah stairs. There are lots of them. You could get the lift. Yeah I get the lift when I’m going to fifth but it’s not the same. You don’t get that feeling of how awesome you are if you simply get the lift. So in this, this lift is no longer going to be mentioned. Stairs, like Everest there are base camps and these are the floors between the stairs. First we have to get to a computer to print off stuff to read on fifth, in other words, go to base camp.

First floor –No free computers, I could stand here for a bit longer but I’d rather just try second.

Second floor –Under construction, try third

Third floor – No computers free, maybe fourth?

Fourth floor – No, there are ones free but they are macs and I’m a PC and I’m just not compatible, but never fear, there a group of computers on fourth known to few and there’s usually several free.
By now I’m way too tired, I log in print off what I need but the pressure is getting to me (or in Everest terms ‘lack of’) I have to move down to a lower altitude, there I can get some more supplies. I head back down now and wonder then this analogy switched to first person?

The folio section. There is no way I can relate this to Everest so I will just say I get my journal; by first checking the library catalogue and much searching between the shelves. After travelling to a lower altitude and thus curing myself of my mountain sickness I am ready to make my way to fifth.

Fifth – the heavenly peak
(This is assuming there is no sixth because I went up there once and was asked what I was doing by the receptionist and so never returned)
I walk into the quiet, tranquil room, peacefulness, sit down at a desk and survey the wonders outside. And like Everest it’s been snowy lately. (Will the comparisons never cease?)

And so, at the top, I try to remember what Morgan Freeman said in the Bucket List about the stillness/music of the mountain or something but I don’t remember. Instead I look out the window to Arthur’s seat and thank fuck the library isn’t up there.




*Once again I’m no expert but I will make it up as I go, 2 weeks sounds like plenty of time to me.